Goncharov: Why did the Internet make up a fake Martin Scorsese movie? | Martin Scorsese

Sian, I’m seeing a lot of talk about a Martin Scorsese film called Goncharov. But I’ve never heard of a Martin Scorsese movie called Goncharov. What’s going on?

Oh yeah, there’s been a lot of talk on Tumblr about the greatest mob movie ever made.

Released in 1973, Scorsese’s little-seen film starred robert deniro like Goncharov, “a former nightclub owner who comes to Naples after the fall of the Soviet Union” with the aim of becoming a mafia boss. Harvey Keitel plays the eyepatch-wearing Andrey (or Andrei) “The Banker” Daddano; Gene Hackman plays Valery Michailov; Al Pacino appears as Mario Ambrosini and Cybill Shepherd plays Goncharov’s wife, Katya. Apparently he was really good and added to the Criterion Collection.

And you’ve never heard of it because it doesn’t really exist.

Than.

Then a few years ago a Tumblr user posted a Photo of some “imitation boots” they had ordered online that had a very strange label on the tongue: “The greatest mob movie ever made. Martin Scorsese presents GONCHAROV. Production by Domenico Proccacci. A film by Matteo JWHJ0715. About the Naples mafia.

This was mostly ignored until 2020, when another Tumblr user wrote a comment on the original post, which read: “this idiot hasn’t seen goncharov.” Like the good lord and the coffee machine from The Guardian, the Internet works in mysterious ways; earlier this month, Tumblr user beelzeebub made a fake poster for the movie, tens of thousands of people suddenly shared it, and lo and behold: a new Scorsese movie was born.

https://beelzeebub.tumblr.com/post/701284869475614720/goncharov-1973-dir-martin-scorsese-the

“,”alt”:”A fake movie poster for a made-up film, Goncharov by Martin Scorsese. The poster reads: Martin Scorsese presents Goncharov. A film by Matteo JWHJ 0715. A tagline underneath says: Winter comes to Naples, while underneath a composite showing Robert De Niro, Al Pacino, Gene Hackman, Harvey Keitel, John Cazale and Cybill Shepherd in various roles, text says ‘The greatest mafia movie ever made’ and A Domenico Proccacci production”,”index”:7,”isTracking”:true,”isMainMedia”:false,”sourceDomain”:”assets.tumblr.com”}”>

Allow content provided by a third party?

This article includes content hosted on resources.tumblr.com. We ask for your permission before anything is uploaded as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies. To view this content, click ‘Allow and continue’.

https://hanniecat922.tumblr.com/post/701464787011371008/goncharov-1973-dir-martin-scorsese

“,”alt”:”A post by Tumblr user hanniecat922 which shows another post by Tumblr user nemesis-is-my-middle-name that reads: bitches will be like \”my ot3 [heart emojis]\” and it’s a woman who could murder them, a guy who hasn’t had good night’s sleep in six years, and another guy who almost got both of the other two murdered. it’s me i’m bitches. Underneath the post are three pictures of Cybill Shepherd, Robert De Niro and Al Pacino respectively, with text overlaid on each. The first reads \”woman who could murder them\”; the second reads \”a guy who hasn’t had good night’s sleep in six years\”; the third reads \”another guy who almost got both of the other two murdered\””,”index”:8,”isTracking”:true,”isMainMedia”:false,”sourceDomain”:”assets.tumblr.com”}”>

Allow content provided by a third party?

This article includes content hosted on resources.tumblr.com. We ask for your permission before anything is uploaded as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies. To view this content, click ‘Allow and continue’.

So Tumblr made it up?

Yes! And like all the best jokes, people have really bought into the part. There’s the movie poster, which has the tagline “the best mob(n) movie ever made.” A music teacher from Indiana composed a musical theme for Goncharov, inspired by The Godfather. There’s also a cash game, with an accompanying soundtrackand a fake vhs. “Academics” wrote essays analyzing the film, which were published in (fake) film magazines. A representative of the movie review platform Letterboxd even told the New York Times that they had to remove several user-submitted reviews of the movie.

https://cloudmancy.tumblr.com/post/701604593052811264/you-see-it-dont-you-youve-become-a-monster

“,”alt”:”A Goncharov film poster made by Tumblr user cloudmancy which shows a stylised illustration of a man in a suit with the sleeves rolled up, on the ground on his hands and knees in a pool of blood. In his left hand he holds a gun. Blood is also dripping from his face, which can be seen reflected in the pool of blood. Positioned above the illustration is a title reading \”Goncharov\” with the letters arranged in a curved line; at the midpoint, there is an illustration of a huge semi-automatic rifle pointing downwards at the man. Underneath the poster, the Tumblr user has written \”‘You see it, don’t you? You’ve become a monster too.’ What if that one iconic backstory scene in goncharov (1973) after he makes his first kill but as a movie poster\” “,”index”:11,”isTracking”:true,”isMainMedia”:false,”sourceDomain”:”assets.tumblr.com”}”>

Allow content provided by a third party?

This article includes content hosted on resources.tumblr.com. We ask for your permission before anything is uploaded as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies. To view this content, click ‘Allow and continue’.

https://leona-florianova.tumblr.com/post/701815664173891584/rare-goncharov-poster-from-czechoslovakia-by-lubo%C5%A1

“,”alt”:”A Goncharov poster made by Tumblr user leona-florianova which is purportedly styled after 1970s Czechoslovakian design, with red and green block colouring and some abstract details overlaid on Robert De Niro’s face”,”index”:12,”isTracking”:true,”isMainMedia”:false,”sourceDomain”:”assets.tumblr.com”}”>

Allow content provided by a third party?

This article includes content hosted on resources.tumblr.com. We ask for your permission before anything is uploaded as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies. To view this content, click ‘Allow and continue’.

People have created mood boards, used scenes from other movies to create Goncharov gifs, and drawn fanart of the best scenes (apparently there’s one involving a ship) and their favorite “ships,” or romantic partners. Being Tumblr, a lot of the fanart is very weird; apparently Goncharov and Keitel’s character, Andrei, have a lot of sexual tension. And somehow, in the space of a couple of weeks, there is already more than 500 Goncharov fanfics published on the Archive of Our Own fanfiction website.

https://shouty-y.tumblr.com/post/701821565294247936/rewatched-goncharov-1973-and-did-a-few-studies

“,”alt”:”Digital paintings of fake Goncharov scenes by Tumblr user shouty-y; the first shows a woman standing on a balcony looking down at the camera with the subtitle \”Long time no see, Katya\”. The second is an extreme close up of a man’s eye with a clock face reflected in the iris, with the subtitle \”Your time is up, Goncharov\”. The third is a streetscape at dusk with the facades of buildings only slightly illuminated by light from yellow streetlamps. In the distance a clocktower can be seen, as well as statues on the eaves of rooftops, while in the foreground appears the dark silhouette of a man wearing a coat and a hat. The subtitle reads [muffled jazz music plays in the background]. The fourth is a close-up of a blonde woman’s face, on the right side of the screen looking left to something off-screen. She is upset and has smears of blood on her cheeks. Behind her the sea is visible as well as a half-moon. The subtitle reads \”Sofia?\””,”index”:14,”isTracking”:true,”isMainMedia”:false,”sourceDomain”:”assets.tumblr.com”}”>

Allow content provided by a third party?

This article includes content hosted on resources.tumblr.com. We ask for your permission before anything is uploaded as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies. To view this content, click ‘Allow and continue’.

Does Scorsese have anything to say about it?

Not yet, it’s hard to imagine Scorsese knowing what Tumblr or shipping is, but I think he might enjoy the hype around it all.

But Wonder Woman and all-time beauty Lynda Carter did. to post two black-and-white photos of her and Henry Winkler captioned, “Me and ‘The Fonz’ at the premiere of Goncharov (1973) at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre.” The image is actually of the Golden Globe Awards 1977.

Even Tumblr itself has joined in, tweeting: “Goncharov was inexplicably ahead of him [sic] time and his contribution to cinema is notable. Rarely does a film tell so many diverse yet interconnected stories. It’s hard to imagine that so few people have seen it.”

This week, Goncharov has been the #1 trending topic on the platform. Scorsese was second.

https://old-pictures-of-bands.tumblr.com/post/701794389427683328/in-a-way-goncharov-1973-really-is-the-greatest

“,”alt”:”In a way Goncharov (1973) really is the greatest gangster movie ever made. There are thousands of people dreaming up their own versions of this movie. With more plot threads than could ever actually fit into a 2 hour movie. No actual film could ever compare to the imagination of a million strangers and that’s weirdly beautiful.”,”index”:22,”isTracking”:true,”isMainMedia”:false,”sourceDomain”:”assets.tumblr.com”}”>

Allow content provided by a third party?

This article includes content hosted on resources.tumblr.com. We ask for your permission before anything is uploaded as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies. To view this content, click ‘Allow and continue’.

I guess the last question to answer is…why?

Like Ratatouille: The Musical (a fake musical based on the movie that finally it was doneafter people started developing a single song posted on TikTok) and Demi Lovato twin sister Poot Lovato (just a bad pic of the singer), people seem to really enjoy coming together to pretend fake things are real. While that impulse can lead to sinister things that seem to be in the news every day, it also leads to sheer bullshit, which should be reason enough to do anything in my opinion.

But somehow along the way, Goncharov has become quite significant: complete strangers, from all over the world, forming a community to tell a story and flex their creative muscles, simply for the fun of the joke.

Share this:

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *